[The audio clicks on, but Bones hesitates before saying anything, because telling everyone about this is just. Not something he wants to do. There are unhappy wolf noises in the background, because Nymeria's staying with McCoy for a while and is decidedly Not Pleased about Arya's disappearance.]

Ar- Cat's gone. [Flat. He's super depressed] Her room's still here, and she's still on my item, so I guess the Admiral booted her home for a while or something. [And Nymeria hasn't been able to track her anywhere, so she probably poofed home. But if any of you assholes kidnapped her or whatever, McCoy will find you and he will make sure you spend the rest of your miserable life being sorry. :|]

If anyone's looking for her in the mean time, let me know.

[It kind of sounds like he wants to leave it at that, but there's stuff to do, and he's good at throwing himself into work when he's depressed. Even if this is really just opening the door for more bullshit and horrors, but oh well. He still sounds pretty flat and resigned, because fuck this place. :\]

Merlin's joining the infirmary staff as another direct care warden, so if anything ever happens to me or I'm not around for whatever reason, you go to him for help. If anyone's got some medical experience and wants to help out, or wants training, Hey- Nymeria- Stop it- [The unhappy wolf noises have been getting louder for a couple seconds, before they're interrupted for a moment as she starts nosing at the communicator curiously (or out of annoyance, stop playing with it and take me to the CES to kill some rabbits plz :|) and McCoy gently tries to get her to stop, finally giving up and turning around, scratching her ears a little.]

We could always use the extra hand. We've got nursing positions open for wardens and inmates, and a couple people who know first aid on call in case we need an extra hand. Inmates'll need warden permission before they can sign on.

Now that we're back to our regularly scheduled programming, [Har har.] I'll be back in the infirmary in a while. For any new people, I'm Doctor Leonard McCoy. I'm the Chief Medical Officer on board the Starship Enterprise, and I'm head of the infirmary here.

[Private to Arya]

You doing alright?

[Private to Merlin]

Thanks for holding down the fort.

[Spam for Jim]

[Messages sent out, McCoy hesitated before sending another to Jim, because he really didn't know what to say to him. It had been a weird flood, and he wasn't exactly great at articulating stuff like thanks for bugging the hell out of me after I threw up on you in a shuttle because my life would really suck without you.

So, after going back and forth about it for a while longer, he got up and headed down to Jim's room, knocking on the door and waiting for his friend to answer the door.]

Do you people need hobbies or something? I can promise you, reading or knitting or whatever's way more productive than stabbing each other in the hallways. Good God. [Heavy, heavy sigh. Fuck all of you and your stab happy bullshit. :\]

For any new arrivals, I'm Doctor Leonard McCoy. I'm the Chief Medical Officer on board the Starship Enterprise back home and I'm the head of the infirmary here.

Some ground rules: you are not allowed to leave the infirmary until you've checked in with a doctor so if you fall on your ass in the hallway during your escape attempt, we've at least got an idea of where the hell you wandered off to and can come looking. The infirmary is always staffed by a medical professional, who are all here to help you when you need it. Don't be a moron and hide something that's just gonna do more damage when it heals incorrectly. We're not gonna bite you.

Anyone who hasn't come in for a quick exam yet should get in here as soon as possible. The procedure's done without physical contact and the results are confidential. They're just used as a baseline so we know what's normal for you in case you're ever brought in here too injured to give proper medical information. [You don't want to die on the operating table because you forgot to mention you're allergic to some antibiotics or painkillers. :|]

Anyone who's medically trained who wants to lend a hand, or anyone who'd like to brush up on some first aid should contact me. Any inmates who volunteer will need their warden's permission before they're approved.

[ooc: If anyone currently in the infirmary/visiting the infirmary/what have you wants to spam him, I am totally down for it! He basically lives in there.]

[So, this is just another weekend on the Barge for Dr. Lenore McCoy, and everyone's constant oh god what is happening is starting to wear on her admittedly easy to piss off nerves. So she looks a little grouchy while broadcasting from the infirmary while wearing some blue scrubs instead of her usual Starfleet uniform, since none of the ones currently in her closet fit correctly.]

Well, whatever the hell this flood is, the infirmary's still open, so if anyone's got anything they're medically freaked out about, I guess come on down.

[She is not convinced this won't unleash some kind of crazy hell upon the staff but. Ohhhh well.]

[Private to Arya]

You okay, Cat?

[Private to Jim]

You'd better not be doing anything stupid.

[Private to Merlin]

How the "princess" treating you?

[ooc: Will be tagging around with damnitjamie and Bones thinks she's always been a woman but remembers you as your correct genders, i.e. Arya is still a girl Jim is still a guy etc.]